Friday, October 03, 2003
comedy of errors
The perfect way to start a Friday:
* wake up late, look out the window, and see frost covering your windshield
* dress your child in a pullover which has a thick collar, which means no bib this morning; pick up child, put child on shoulder, and hear a noise which means "hahaha, it's fun to spit up!"
* juggle two bags and a baby while walking to the finally defrosted car, get everything packed away, and realize you forgot your briefcase
* halfway to the babysitter's, look at your gas gauge—the needle is teasing the E
* you, of course, have no money, and took your credit card out of your purse to curb unnecessary spending (your current predicament is the best argument against common sense ever)
* stop at the 7-11 next to the neighborhood where zee boy is working today, unpack the baby, and try to call him; lucky for you that you have a calling card left over from vacation, because the only change is the car is a handful of PENNIES
* what the hell is the point of having a horrible cell phone if you don't have it ON the ONE TIME your wife needs you to answer?
* pack the baby back into the car and try to make it into town using what you can only assume is the kinetic energy of little leprechauns pedaling bicycles in your gas tank as fuel
* traffic—well, at least there's an excuse for being late now
* leave the babysitter's only to find that you can't turn where you need to turn because traffic is backed up past the light while the light is green
* right turns on red don't work out so well when other cars are making u-turns into your lane
* nearly get clipped by an asshole in a pickup who apparently thinks you should stop while he leisurely crosses the road, even though he's crossing lanes of traffic from a turning lane he shouldn't be turning from in the first place
Wow, I guess I'm making up for the goodness of the past couple of days, huh? Oh, wait, the past few days haven't been all that great. I hope there's someone out there having a fantastic week so that the balance of the universe is still okay.
* wake up late, look out the window, and see frost covering your windshield
* dress your child in a pullover which has a thick collar, which means no bib this morning; pick up child, put child on shoulder, and hear a noise which means "hahaha, it's fun to spit up!"
* juggle two bags and a baby while walking to the finally defrosted car, get everything packed away, and realize you forgot your briefcase
* halfway to the babysitter's, look at your gas gauge—the needle is teasing the E
* you, of course, have no money, and took your credit card out of your purse to curb unnecessary spending (your current predicament is the best argument against common sense ever)
* stop at the 7-11 next to the neighborhood where zee boy is working today, unpack the baby, and try to call him; lucky for you that you have a calling card left over from vacation, because the only change is the car is a handful of PENNIES
* what the hell is the point of having a horrible cell phone if you don't have it ON the ONE TIME your wife needs you to answer?
* pack the baby back into the car and try to make it into town using what you can only assume is the kinetic energy of little leprechauns pedaling bicycles in your gas tank as fuel
* traffic—well, at least there's an excuse for being late now
* leave the babysitter's only to find that you can't turn where you need to turn because traffic is backed up past the light while the light is green
* right turns on red don't work out so well when other cars are making u-turns into your lane
* nearly get clipped by an asshole in a pickup who apparently thinks you should stop while he leisurely crosses the road, even though he's crossing lanes of traffic from a turning lane he shouldn't be turning from in the first place
Wow, I guess I'm making up for the goodness of the past couple of days, huh? Oh, wait, the past few days haven't been all that great. I hope there's someone out there having a fantastic week so that the balance of the universe is still okay.
